Adventures in an igloo

I love kids- kids are great. They are the cutest little rugrats and I just feel like pinching their chubby little cheeks while asking them with a silly voice: “Can I take you home and keep you, you little cutesy wootsie?” I generally think that there just aren’t enough kids to go around and I think that these little cherubs go with every occasion because they spread so much joy…

Now in an alternate universe this statement could be true and that would be a universe where Tinky Winky is the president of my rock and that purple creep Barney would be the mayor of my city.

So, I sometimes judge kids a weebit too harshly but lets face it people: when the hammer falls they fully deserve it.

I don’t hate kids if that’s what you think, no not at all. I can enjoy the company of the well-behaved and non-whiny type of kids as much as the next person. To be honest, I generally like kids, BUT, there’s a time and a place for everything and the reason for this entry is not a kid- but an inconsiderate parent.

OK, it’s the complaint corner again, so here goes:

When a movie is rated 12- that generally means that people who get paid for knowing better believe that the contents of the particular flick is not suitable for viewers under the age of twelve.

Then how come a kindergartener was sitting next to me at Indiana Jones part 4 yesterday?

What a lovely experience for me; First of all the 5-year old can’t read, so naturally and understandably the little rat kept asking the dad: “Daaaaaddy, what are they talking about?” “What about now daaaaaaaddy?” “What’s Indy saying now Daaaaaad?”

Then the blasted little bugger repeated loudly and proudly over and over again: “Daaad, I finished this level in my Indiana Jones Lego computer game!”
“That’s great kid, but I paid and arm and a leg for my goddam ticket so shut the hell up” was what I wanted to say but of course I just cursed on the inside and got more and more frustrated.

Afterwards, I realized that the kid wasn’t the one to blame, it was the dad. So if any of you have kids, please note that:
1) If the film’s rated 12 that means it’s not for toddlers.
2) If your kid doesn’t know how to read and the film’s not in the kid’s first language, tell the little creature that it’s strictly forbidden to talk at the movies in fact tell them that it's always forbidden to talk during a movie show- or else the boogey man will be waiting outside...
3) And last but not least try to remember what it was like when you still hadn’t procreated and remember that not everyone enjoys your kids’ comments- after all that’s not the bonus material you paid for.

If I want to enjoy screaming and running at the movies, I’ll buy a ticket to Bambi strikes back, not IJ4.

People: Don’t bring a knife to a gunfight…except when I'm sitting next to your annoying little offspring- because I'm too chicken to tell you what I really think...

# posted by Björkin : 3:15 PM